Patriots Nation

My blog title has nothing to do with anything other than Tom Brady being freed and that the Patriots won the season opener against the Steelers. We should celebrate that!

However I just had a conversation with Stephen about the NFL “donating” proceeds from merchandise sold in Pink October to the American Cancer Society but it is actually very little money out of their coffers and none of it is for research to find a cure. Aren’t’ we all “aware” enough? I just read the most obnoxious article about Joan Lunden in People about how she is “cured” and beat cancer’s ass and would now do everything to make sure she doesn’t get it again. She is clueless–she has no control over her cells mutations and I was “cured” for 12 years ( I would never have used that terminology because my doctor told me I wasn’t cured unless I died of something else). My cancer did not recur because I didn’t do enough to make sure it didn’t come back or try hard enough. I have had 12 years to ponder on that one. Really on a roll today.

I am also celebrating getting through this week without throwing up since Monday. Mission Cheezit is working! Colleen also gave me two boxes of oyster crackers to add to my growing stash. The only downside is all the salt. Cancer killed my right kidney which no longer works and is never going to come back to life. The result of that is high blood pressure for which I take daily medication. It occurred to me recently that no one cares about my high blood pressure management or my teeth or any other side medical problem—-because I won’t likely live long enough for it to matter. High Blood Pressure–who cares? We aren’t worried about how your heart will be in 20 years so you are good to go. Screw em! I had two hours of dental work this morning to replace two crowns and re-bond my front teeth which is totally cosmetic. I also highlighted my chemo thinning hair. I am not going to give in to that “loser” mentality nor should anybody else. I want to leave a good-looking corpse, hence the blog photo from 11 years ago when I had lots of estrogen pumping through me. Moving on. 

Last weekend we had no plans. It turned out fantastic. Friday I lolled around the house which I am especially good at. Saturday we headed to Newport for an afternoon on the wharf –window shopping, strolling, people watching, and then on to Tim Blanket’s favorite spot–the Adirondack chairs on the lawn at Castle Hill for gimlets followed by dinner with clam chowder. It never gets old!

We drove home with the top down and seat warmers on! Sunday, Kelsey and her man came for a cookout followed by the surprise appearance of Brian and Elizabeth for a fire pit. Monday morning brought a lot of throwing up but dammit, I rallied, and we went boating in Westport with Bill and Carla and more chowder at Back Eddy’s. Why, for the mother of god does summer ever have to end?

Work week rolled out with plenty of heat and the promise of more to come. Haven’t thrown up since Monday after I conceded to give up coffee–it was killing my stomach and I don’t want to take more drugs than I already am (not really). Had a decent appointment at Dana Farber and scheduled my next round of Pet scans in early October to see if the chemo is still working, got lost yet again on the Alice in Wonderland elevators to the parking garage, checked out the Halloween display in the gift shop (WHAT?) The coconuts are fine, going about the business of settling in for the Fall.

My song choice: Mostly because I love Green Day and hate September generally.

“Wake Me Up When September Ends”

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Like my father’s come to pass
Seven years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Ring out the bells again
Like we did when spring began
Wake me up when September ends

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when September ends

Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends

Final thought:

“Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness.” -Euripedes

Love,

Barbwire xoxo